May 2004 Archives

Last night I made my official review visit to a Beijing KFC; it is conviniently located on the ground floor of our hotel. Of course I had the Twister, which in China is called a “mexican wrap,” and my impression was not positive. The wrap was ill prepared and not at all what I was expecting. I have to give KFC Beijing a thumbs down.

My next fast food stop will of course be McDonald’s. I will let you know about my findings as soon as I find them.

… what did you do today? Uh huh, that’s what I thought.

But seriously, this is amazing! The Forbidden City has been on my Ultimate Places to Visit list since I was a little kid and watched the movie The Last Emperor at one of my sister’s friend’s houses. (Mommy made Kj take me I think. But Kj’s friend’s mom was nice to took pity on me.)You shoudld all see the movie if you haven’t yet. It is a historically fictional account of the life of the last Chinese emperor Puyi, who was forced to abdicate in 1912 after the nationalist revolution. He was allowed to live in the Forbidden City until he was in his 20’s.

The City is about 710,000 square kilometers of nested courtyards, temples, gardens, residences, etc. And it is absolutely beautiful and a little overwhelming to take in all at once. We spent three and a half hours wandering on a straight path through the main gate (under a giant picture of Mao) to the last garden, without exploring the areas on either side of the center-way. For perspective, only about 30% of the city is open to the public and we saw probably half of that space. Nevertheless it was amazing and exhausting and I got a sunburn (even under the complementary umbrella) and a I had a great time! I am thinking I might go back on my own and do some further exploration. Who knows? There is so much to see.

After the Forbidden City a bunch of us took the subway (40 cents per ride, eat your heart out New York) to a shopping district called “Oriental Plaza.” Remember that we are not permitted to call things oriental anymore; this area doesn’t seem to have gotten the memo yet.

If you can get past the absolutely foul smell of the “stinky tofu” (which for those of you familiar with farming smells a lot like fertilizer) you can get to a great little china shop that sells famous porcelain from the Guangdong province in southern China. This is apparently primo stuff we are talking about here. Beautiful services of 56 pieces for ten people. The services are Chinese style so they come with a porcelain soupspoon and tiny bowl that is useful for nothing more than storing said spoon. We spent another three hours there, and a few of the girls made out with some great deals. One of the girls traveling with us is from Taiwan and she can bargain with the best of them. We can稚 leave the hotel without her because she bargains so well and because, well, you know, she speaks Mandarin.

More minor updates to come. Back soon.

Beijing is freaking huge. Beijing is teeming with people. Beijing has an odd lack of traffic lights—of traffic rules for that matter. The warned us that we would have to watch ourselves when we crossed the street, but this is ridiculous—there has to be some kind of system here people! But nope, it’s every car, bike, truck, and man for himself out here in the Chinese capital. Have no fear though, I look both ways as I am crossing the street!

Initial impressions of Beijing:

• wow, it’s big
• geez, there are a lot of people here
• holy crap, I almost got hit by 3 cars and a bus—all at once
• whoa, that’s cheap
• omg, this weather is so much nicer than Hong Kong
• dearest lord, I like fish—if I can meet it first
• you are kidding? that is CHEAP

There is something fishy going on with the pictures I posted—maybe it is the fish I had yesterday for lunch. But the pictures ARE there and they will pull up if you keep trying (it worked last night for me, but not this morning). Sorry for the inconvenience, I know how much all of you wanted to look at my pretty face in China. As soon as I get more time I will figure out what is going on and get it fixed.

Thanks for reading. Stay tuned, we are leaving for Beijing this afternoon so much exciting news is in store. Plus, depending on my web access in Beijing, I may get to post some pictures—although who knows if you will be able to see them.

[UPDATE: The picture problem is fixed. I won’t bore you with a long explanation.]

On 23 May we took a bus out to Lantau Island to east of Hong Kong; it is one of the several islands that make up the Hong Kong SAR (Special Administrative Region). The mountains of Lantau are home to the largest outdoor sitting Buddha in the world. Apparently there are other indoor and/or standing Buddhas that are bigger, but I haven’t seen any yet, or even heard about them for that matter, they must be out there, though. The Buddha is located at the Po Lin Monastery and was built in the early 1990’s, so it’s not ancient, which would make it quite a feat considering the winding roads we used to get to it. I’m surprised I am still in one piece after riding a bus that navigated one lane roads at top speed against other oncoming buses. It was definitely a ‘had to be there’ experience.

Here are some pictures from the trip.

Buddha from the side.

Detail of a dragon on the pillars outside of one of the main temples at the Po Lin Monastery complex. Photos of the interior were prohibited.

A traditional dragon dance on the temple grounds in front of the stairs to the Buddha.

A flower from a koi pond on the temple grounds.

Koi from the pond. These were some huge koi, people. I tried to get one as it came to the surface to eat, but the buggers are quick.

View of the Buddha from the main temple at the monastery. The Buddha is at the top of a mountain, and it is about 350 steps from the monastery to the base of the statue.

Who knows. I am currently pretending it is a minor Buddhist deity.

More of the Buddha.

The stairway up to the base of the Buddha.

Me stylin’ some Dior glasses at out vegetarian lunch at Po Lin. You should see and taste the things these people can do with taro. Chicken that looks and tastes like chicken but is taro, ditto fish. Very yummy stuff.

Shot of our veggie lunch. Stay away from the lotus/poi dish, it’s not very tasty.

In my continuing effort to bring my friends and family tidbits of information that they won’t find anywhere else I bring you my latest finding—a review of KFC in China.

First of all, KFC is huge in Hong Kong, I am told. And it looks like that’s not far from the truth. Not only have I ran across tons of locations—as many as McDonald’s, in fact—but they are packed all the time. The Chinese seem to like our fair Kentucky’s most famous delicacy: fried birdie parts. Although, my feeling is that they are getting screwed in the deal, I found the chicken to be dry and tasteless. This is mostly due to the fact that it appears to be less greasy—those silly health conscious Chinese people, they don’t understand what KFC is all about: fat.

[This is for you Katie C.] Now for the best part; it is my pleasure to report that the KFC Twister I had last night at the Festival Walk mall (very chi chi) was at least as good as those found in Prague. They are about the same size as well, about the size of a small tortilla. There will always be a special place in my stomach for the Twister because Katie and I bonded over daily Twisters while we lived in Prague last year.

I promise my other posts will not deal exclusively with the food available here in HK, although to be honest my main activities have been eating and shopping for bootleg DVDs, with the occasional academic trip thrown in for good measure.

Maybe you haven’t already heard, but I am a nerd. This may come as a shock to many of you who know me well, but it’s true. To prove my point I am about to expound on my sincere love and fascination with public transportation, specifically subways. Feel free to stop reading at this point unless you happen to also be a big geek, and find traveling at high speeds underground through small tubes to be highly enjoyable, as I obviously do.

Of the places I have visited so far, Berlin has the best public transportation. It is particularly well developed, easy to use, albeit expensive. But the Honk Kong subway has got Berlin beat—if not totally then at least as far as the quality of the stations, trains, announcements, etc.

You have got to see this to really understand the amazing quality of the subways here. If you have ever been to New York you know how a subway system can degrade and how poorly it can be designed. The HK subway is the opposite entirely; it is “fresh, clean, and tidy” as the announcements say. Granted the system is newer than and not as extensive the NYC metro, but there are a lot of lessons we can learn. Here are a few of the coolest features of HK’s system:

• Stations feel like you are inside a building, not underground, i.e. air conditioned, brightly lit, spotless, completely odor free.
• All stations are similarly laid out and signage is completely clear. Each exit is labeled with a letter and lists indicate which exit will lead to which landmarks.
• On the platforms in most stations the tracks are separated from the station by glass doors that open when the train doors open.
• All announcements are automated and clearly audible, plus they come in three languages—Cantonese, Mandarin, and English.
• Above each door on the trains a panel indicated direction of travel, all the stations in the system, the next stop, and which side of the train to exit on.
• The MTR trusts people—the paid parts of stations are only separated from the unpaid parts by a half-sized glass wall.
• Instead of swiping a magnetic card, riders use a card that they only have to hold next to a proximity panel, which avoids mis-swipes and saves a lot of rummaging in bags—you just hold your bag up to the turnstile.

I have some pictures of the stations that I will post sometime, I’m sure you are all desperately interested and can’t wait to see them. Stay tuned for more updates from HK.

This morning The Washington Post reported that al Queda has plans to launch a “large scale” attack sometime this summer. Evidently al Queda likes the electoral effects of the Madrid train bombing in March, and is looking to reprise the method in the US. The article quotes a US “federal official” as saying:

They saw that an attack of that nature can have economic and political consequences and have some impact on the electoral process.

While I can’t argue with the validity of the conclusion that al Queda is looking to impact our political process, to the point of influencing the presidential elections next November, it is frightening to think that the administration may use this theory to its advantage. By that I mean to say that the President may attempt to convince people that by voting for Kerry they are in fact doing exactly what al Queda wants them to do. Of course the assumption I am making is that a new attack would drive voters toward Kerry, which I am not convinced is the case. But I can just see this theory being used by politicians to drive public opinion—and regardless of who does it, I think it is dangerous.

[via the Washington Post]

If I never see another soupy noodle it will be too soon! Come on people, where is the fried rice, I thought I was going to China, but apparently the Italians all moved out here. Everything so far has been some sort of noodle dish, usually in a soup/broth of some kind. It has only been two days and I am already getting sick of eating Chinese food, which is surprising because I love Chinese food. Katie, you would be in absolute misery here, this is not like Chinese food from the States, we are talking hard-core stuff here. But I have been adventurous and am trying to eat everything—at least a little bit. Although i have not violated my ban on ‘swimmy’ things. Some lines are better left not crossed, don’t you agree?

The food has been an experience worth having all by itself though. We all talk about going to our favorite ‘hole in the wall’ restaurant to get the best food for cheap, but this morning I went to the ultimate in holes in the wall. It was a dingy area that looked like it was meant to be a public walkway, but a restaurant moved in instead. They serve other food I think, but we went to have ‘congee’ (pronounced ‘con’-artist ‘gee’-whiz) for breakfast. Congee is similar to porridge—us Norwegians can compare it to rice and green grut. It’s soupy and neutral tasting though. Then they add beef or pork or seafood to it as well as this fried bread (also tastless). It is really different, but tasty nontheless—and really filling.

Lunch yesterday was my favorite though, we had dim sum at a resturant on campus here at Hong Kong Baptist University, where we are staying. I had never had dim sum before but I had a vague idea of how it worked. Nothing could have prepared me for this though. It was incredible. We sat around a huge circular table with a large lazy susan in the middle and watched in awe as they brought in dish after dish after dish. Even the Chinese people that came on the trip were freaked out by how much food they brought out. There was no way we could possibly have finished it all, or even gotten close to trying. Eventually we had to ask them to stop bringing food, but they wouldn’t stop. It took our professor and his friend from the university 10 minutes to get them to stop. I am still not clear on exactly why they didn’t want to cut off the food flow. But it was yummy and I hope we get to have another go some time before we leave. I ate so much I had to be rolled out when we left, and I wasn’t interested in eating for the rest of the day.

Real Chinese food stick to your ribs, let me tell you. You all know how I like to eat… a lot. But for the last two days I have eaten twice a day and that is it, and I haven’t been really hungry for much more. It’s amazing, but my prediction that I would lose weight is most likely not going to come true after all. Oh well, I am going to enjoy myself anyway.

I have to go eat some of my newly-purchased Chinese breads now. I will have some more updates for you soon, and possibly some pictyures to show you as well. I know you are all dying to see me mugging in front of various places you don’t recognize. Pictures like that are always fun times for all.

Listen up United Airlines pilots flying in Asia, specifically between Tokyo anmd Hong Kong—this is teh 21st century and calling Asia the ‘Orient’ is no longer appropriate. It is in fact rude, or so I found out from some fellow travelers. I was not aware of this either; in fact I was under the impression that people were Asian now but food could still be Oriental, so I fogured the region could be the Orient too. Nope, bad bad bad. We have to be PC.

But we are still allowed to say that the Orient—um, I mean Asia—is crazy and there are crap loads of people here. And we are still allowed to say that it is a bit overwhelming being in a new place like this, esecially when you have no hope of understanding a word that anyone is speaking and you can’t read a damn thing either. This is particularly true after 24 hours spent on airplanes, in airports waiting for airplanes, or thinking about being on airplanes or in airports waiting for airplanes.

We are in Hong Kong now (it is tomorrow here) and we have spent a full day running around. I expect many more full days to come because our professor has endless amounts of energy that I just can’t even conceive of at this point. I don’t know how he does it but someone how a 50 year old man has made the rest of us 20 somethings look like weak, unhealthy losers. Thanks very much Prof. Lum.

CLearly you all don’t care about everyting I am doing each moment of the day, so I won’t bore you with the details, but rest assured my life is currently many degrees more interesting than yours—unless you are currently traveling abroad, in which case you are cool too and congratulations.

There is a large man pacing back and for and muttering under his breath behind me, I think he wants to use the Internet terminal so I am going to go now. Perhaps something worth reporting will happen in the next few days.

One last thought, remember that I am a cool world traveler and you are not—see previously mentioned caveat.

Look out Neiman Marcus, the gays are on their way to register for wedding gifts. Starting tomorrow, Moday, 17 May, same-sex couples will be able to marry in Massachusetts. And you know all those guys and girls are gonna want to get great gifts just like everyone else.

I predict that this will be a boon for the economy. Maybe President Bush support gay marriage as an economic initiative? Studies have shown that homosexuals typically have more disposable income that straight people. Apparently it’s because we don’t normally have any of the childrens.

[via the AP]

Naturally, last Thursday’s commencement exercises where followed by a debauched party at Ideeya down on West Broadway. Here are a few choice pictures from the festivities. Click on each image to get the full effect.

There are like 5 million positions in the Kama Sutra and no way you can remember them all, it’s just too much to keep in your tiny brain. But Swatch, the 80s watch people, have come up with a really easy and convenient way to remember the best Kama Sutra positions at all times. They have printed them on the face of their latest watch—and the illustrations are of little toy bunnies! Not only that, but when you touch the face of the watch the hands spin to a different set of bunnies, thus keeping your sex life from getting dull and routinized. (Who wants the same Kama Sutra position every week?) This is a great leap forward in the sex aid marketplace. I see a huge latent demand for these little beauties.

To accompany the launch of the new line of watches, Swatch has put up a huge billboard ad above the entrance to their Times Square store location. And apparently it has some pedestrians kinda scared. And why shouldn’t they be, there are huge bunnies the size of small children having wild sex on the side of a building for all to see. How rude! It gets better, the add carried the tagline, “Touch your swatch, pick your position.”

I just found out that 1st Lt. Don Homiller, the son of a friend of mine, is being re-deployed to Iraq soon, and I wanted to wish him luck. I hope he gets back home safely, after having helped make Iraq a safer and more democratic place.

The Virginia General Assembly passed House Bill 751. At the center of the legislation is the following language:

>A civil union, partnership contract or other arrangement between persons of the same sex purporting to bestow the privileges or obligations of marriage is prohibited. Any such civil union, partnership contract or other arrangement entered into by persons of the same sex in another state or jurisdiction shall be void in all respects in Virginia and any contractual rights created thereby shall be void and unenforceable.

I’m no lawyer; I’m no judge either, so I’m just making some assumptions about the way courts interpret laws. And it looks like this statute can easily be interpreted in a way that would make contracts like powers of attorney, wills, etc. invalid because they are often entered into specifically to impart marriage-like privileges for gay men and women; specifically, the right to visit your loved one in the hospital, to make medical decisions for your partner, and to control mutual property. How are those bad things?

This isn’t even about the ‘marriage’ debate, it is about keeping two people who love each other for doing anything to secure their rights with regards to one another. Two mutually consenting adults are to be denied the right to act on the other’s behalf, not because that would require the legalization of equal marriage rights, but because what they want to do merely resembles a marriage.

This is a childish law designed to advance a certain view of marriage held by a group of social conservatives. These are not the kinds of laws that we need in this country; they do not help people. What they do is hinder the freedom of a minority group because a “majority” does not approve of its private life.

My mom sent me a link to a site with some pictures of these amazing ice sculptures and pictures of the Great Wall of China. And it just sank in that I am going to China next week and at that point I think I might have peed myself a little bit because I got so excited!

Now, if any of you would like me to bring you back something, you need to submit a request via email as soon as possible. I am gonna have to plan ahead for the kind of luggage I need to get all this stuff home. It might end up that I have so much stuff for myself that there will not be any room left for any of your requests, in which case I will send you a nice consolation card. Sorry, priorities. But seriously, if you want something let me know and I will see what I can do.

Now go check out those pictures, and eat your heart out! Mwahahahahaha.

No doubt few of you have ever had occasion to visit a foreign consulate, let alone the Chinese Consulate General here in New York, but I encourage all of you to consider popping by its 42 St./West Side Hwy location on your next trip in this general direction. It is quite a show.

The best place from which to enjoy the festivities is pressed against the glass doors at the head of the line while being screamed at, in Chinese (curses no doubt), by a mass of unruly would-be pickers-up. From this vantage point you can truly appreciate the fact that you do not spend your days as an underpaid rent-a-cop stationed between a bunch of impatient travelers and their, apparently very popular and highly prized, visas. I can vouch for the experience because that is exactly the position in which I found myself today as I sought my own Chinese tourist visa, for my trip later this month.

Here’s how your visit could go:

After waiting in the (wrong) line for 30 minutes you may find yourself summoned to the head of the queue by a nice blond woman who feels your pain, as I did. And you might encounter at your back an abrasive but helpful fellow New Yorker seeking visas for her clothing-executive bosses, just as I did. And this abrasive but helpful New Yorker who “does this all the time” will promptly begin banging on the door, seeking the attention of the guard who may not-so-politely tell her that she has to wait her “goddamn” turn.

Once inside, the abrasive-but-helpful-New Yorker will guide you through the masses of people to a hidden kiosk that produces little slips of paper, which suddenly banish the confusion in favor of order and precision. Only the abrasive-but-helpful-New Yorker will argue that the system doesn’t work at all, and you should just place yourself (behind her) in a line, despite the number on your ticket being 155 (same as the number above the teller’s window) and the number on her ticket being called to a different window.

At this point you will wait while your abrasive-but-helpful-New Yorker friend unnecessarily subverts the system and the vaguely German fellow behind you tacitly accuses you of disrupting the flow.

You will shortly find yourself at the window, having been summarily abandoned by the abrasive-but-helpful-New Yorker. In a maximum of 25 seconds at the window you will disgorge your application, passport, and photo and will be given, in exchange, a simple, carbon copy receipt, and will be ordered to return four working-days hence.

At this point you may or may not meet up with your abrasive but helpful New Yorker in her mad dash to get back downtown to her clothing-executives bosses. She might offer to share a cab with you, on her bosses nickel, of course, but seeing as it’s a beautiful day out you decline and bid her goodbye.

Oops. Yesterday, a party boat full of gay party goers tipped over on Lake Austin. Apparently everyone moved to one side of the boat as it was passing Hippie Hollow, the only public nude beach in Texas. The authorities say no one was killed and two people (out of 60) were injured and sent to the hospital.

All I can say is that I hope there were some sexy people on the beach yesterday.

[via the AP]

Here’s an interesting story: Net-earnings (read: profit) at Chevron-Texaco, the second-largest oil and gas company in the US, were $2.56 billion for the first quarter of 2004. That’s a 33% increase year-over-year. That’s two and half billion dollars in three months people!! And it’s not even the peak gas buying season! Just think about what kind of profits they’ll be raking in next month and over the summer.

But what’s even more intriguing is that gas prices have been so high lately, supposedly to account for an increase in the price of crude oil due to OPEC production cuts. Yet the high prices seem to have the effect of significantly boosting profits, rather than stabilizing them.

I have a hard time condemning the oil companies for these higher profits and higher prices because I am a capitalist—they are simply charging what the market can bear. But there seems to be some kind of dishonesty at work here. We are told that they have to charge more at the pump because crude costs too much and yet they end up with a massive jump in profits?

But there is a simple solution to the high gas prices (which, by the way, are about half than anywhere else in world). Stop driving as much, get rid of your outsized SUV, and buy a fuel efficient car.

[via theFinancial Times Online]